Post 16-12-14: Rising Above The Fall

 

How do you stab a country’s aspirations, hopes and dreams? Well then you let 16-12-14 (also known as the Peshawar Massacre or Peshawar tragedy) happen. I do not need to retell the events of this catastrophic day. We all know that the Taliban entered the Army Public School in Peshawar, Pakistan and killed around 150 people. We all know that at least 150 families were destroyed that day, survivors crippled and a nation in a state of shock and sorrow, the wounds scarring us deep.

The question I will ask you is now what. Now what should we do? Sadly time travel does not exist. We can only move forward and let this tragedy change us all for the better.

Below I have enlisted how we can all rise above this fall:

 

Give: There are a lot of survivors who need blood donations. The school needs money to get refurbished. The families need support emotionally as well. Therefore give in whatever way that you can. These people here are doing a good job at giving.

Stop complaining: Some of you might have been fired or have had received a bad grade on your exam. It’s okay to feel bad about yourself and how it all would’ve, could’ve, should’ve gone better.  But you certainly should not stay in a state of gloom and doom forever. Pain does demand to be acknowledged but you can certainly live with pain (Thank you TFIOS). Plus stuff like getting a bad grade doesn't exactly classify as PAIN. It's just one of life's ups and downs. So it certainly won’t do us any good to our lives by complaining about the petty issues. This is important because there are people who would give anything to have another day back. There are people who don’t have complete control over their bodies anymore. Just think about those school children and their families. That is pain. Please be grateful people.

Sacrifice: In the true spirit of humanity there were some glorious teachers’ of   16-12-14 who when faced with the gunmen said that they’d let them kill the children over their dead bodies. Those teachers were burnt alive. Before saving themselves they hid the 1st graders in cabinets and shielded them. The principal, Tahira Qazi could have ran for her life. Instead she helped some children escape and on the second time she reached school to save the students she was caught and killed. That is how we must learn to sacrifice. Selflessness makes us warriors.

Carpe Diem:  Life is so short. It was shorter for those from the Army Public School. It’s important to cherish everyday because we have no idea what will happen to us the next minute. It is also equally necessary to not let a day go wasted. Having wasted time is common death bed regret. Don’t let it be yours either. Go from this world having bettered it and having made use of the time you have been blessed with.

Pray: Pray for the departed souls and pray for the world. Prayer is powerful. In fact just praying to god and the belief that He will take care of everything helps so much.Read here to find out why we shouldn't doubt the power of prayer. 

 

I hope these pointers do help us rise above our fall .

 

 

Raise Your Placards: 3 Nifty Things I Learnt at Model UN

Simply put Model UN has become a phenomenon here in Pakistan. Kids are just dying to raise their placards. Our enthusiasm cannot be sated. The country's political instability isn't even an excuse anymore with the delegates amounting to 1000 at conferences. And now it's not just an activity but a serious extra-curricular.

Now I will not say that I'm a an MUN genius. Regardless, these conferences teach me so much. 

So, what exactly did I learn? Well,

Throughout the article I shall refer to the act of participating in Model UN as MUNing and a person who conducts the act as a MUNer.

1. Just Do It

Prepare a speech. Raise your placard. Breathe in. Breathe out. Deliver.

Now that's usually how it's done. What happens if you don't even raise your placard for the fear of your speech not being up to the mark.

I would even end up analyzing my speech for too long and then I'd:

a) Not even try;

b) Someone would say the exact same thing and get applauded for it.

Don't over think it. The good speeches will come. So what if it wasn't as good Malaysia's or France's. You won't even know if you won't just do it.

2. Caterpillars turn into Butterflies

Some delegates may be 14 and they'll be winning their 3rd consecutive Best Delegate Award. Some 20 year old delegates I met stated that they had gotten progressively better and then became good enough to win the Best Delegate Award through trial and error.`

Don't be so frustrated if you don't think you have the skills at the moment. They just need to develop Everyone grows at their own pace and you will too turn from a caterpillar into a butterfly. 

3. You CAN become a best delegate

You can only be an excellent painter if you paint. While painting to some may seem like a God-gifted forte, that is not the case. Malcolm Gladwell explores in his book " Outliers" is that the most extra-ordinary composers, painters, fiction writers ,etc. all gave their particular forte 10,000 hours of practise and that is what distinguished them from their peers.

So, while some delegates may seem like they were born for MUNing you too can be just as good.

Easier said than done? Yes. Impossible? Not at all. Like I said. You can get progressively better. So just like you have to exercise and eat healthy to lose weight you must also  improve your social skills, public speaking and general knowledge about politics. Practise, practise , practise.

I'll end with a quote:

Savour

I have seen so much improvement in my cousin. He's started Ritalin which is an ADHD medication. The results are encouraging. He's become more focused, his hyperactivity is reduced and yeah he's gotten better at interacting with people.

I can't say he's a neruotypical kid now and that his challenges are ceased but the beauty of having an autistic family member is that you learn to savour the good moments. You do a little happy dance at every milestone reached. And that's what matters.

I think its necessary to appreciate the little things because that makes way for happiness and also a desire to stay involved in whatever you're working with. Our quest for big achievements ,which take longer to accomplish make it easier for us to throw in the towel. And then giving up is harmful too because:
a)  starting over after giving up takes longer; and
b) in the words of Dory from finding Nemo you can't "Just keep swimming".

For the love of swimming, appreciate the little stuff. Savour.
 

Special Education In Pakistan

I wrote with all the power my hand could muster. My test paper- though unfinished - snatched from me. Anxiety followed. Then guilt at my worthlessness. ALL of my friends (okay let's not call them my friends.Friends don't question your brain's ability to function. They are my classmates.) had finished their exam.

 My teachers say that I'm naughty. That I don't work hard enough. That I'm a slacker. How could the whole class understand that quadratic equation but not you Hamza, they say. I don't know, I reply. 

This has been happening all my life in school. I'm about to flunk.

The above mentioned paragraph gives us insight into the life of a kid with ADHD .What a  pathetic little kid. You say? I bet we all have (I certainly do) a kid similar to the one above in our classes.

Did it ever occur to us that maybe the child is going through something. Maybe domestic violence? Child Abuse? A disability perhaps? We must realise that nobody likes humiliation. Which means that whatever a person does in front of people that makes them look like an idiot (to us) is an accident or it is something they cannot  help themselves with. We must realize that (or teachers and parents at least) that not every child who isn't studying or disobeying you is doing it purposely.

I'm not a doctor ,a teacher or even a parent. But since my cousin was diagnosed with autism I've learned a thing or two. It's more of a problem in Pakistan because:

1) Teachers don't need any training or prior education to teach at a school .Okay, it will be checked whether they have a some education. Other than that it won't be seen whether they can handle a class of 40 kids or whether they have any understanding of various behavioral or intellectual problems in children.

2) In a class of 40 kids a kid with an issue can't get any individual help. The (bad) teacher already has her hands full with the entire class. The problem child will just  be dismissed as uncooperative, defiant and it is believed that a good yell will fix the child.

3) There is very little awareness about intellectual or behavioral disorders in Pakistan.

4) Schools lack supplies to handle disabilities.

Heck, if you tell a school before hand about your child's disorder they won't even enroll him. (True story)

According to article 2 of the United Nations Declaration of Human Rights:

"Everyone is entitled to all the rights and freedoms set forth in this Declaration, without distinction of any kind, such as race, colour, sex, language, religion, political or other opinion, national or social origin, property, birth or other status."

And according to article 26: 

"Everyone has the right to education."

I repeat :"Everyone has the right to education without distinction of any kind."

Educating such children may be difficult ,you say, but it is not impossible. They are entitled to this education.Who are we to deny it? 

The Round Pegs In The Square Holes

Some kids have some kind of magic in them. They're called the gifted ones. Malcolm Gladwell's "Outliers" tells us otherwise. It tells us that people usually succeed because of significant opportunities that pivot their life and that a person's inherited culture and ancestors changes how a person functions daily. The reason the Chinese work so hard is because their ancestors had to work diligently due to the complicated system of farming.

My point is that there is something about these people that is so utterly right (or wrong) is that they become unstoppable. Nothing satiates them. Something drives them .

No one could have said it better than Steve Jobs:

“Here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes… The ones who see things differently — they’re not fond of rules… You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things… They push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.”

:' True poetry

Highly Insatiable

The human being is a difficult creature. Highly insatiable. We always need something (when we just want it).

I was watching House today. There was a 16 year old boy diagnosed with something so complicated that I'm too stupid to even remember what it was. Anyways he was dying.

He NEEDED more time to live. Not more girlfriends, money , fame , A's or alcohol.

Just more time to live.

We better start craving all the right things before our time ends.

For example happiness.

Come Hail Or Snow

That feeling started to stir inside me. That feeling where I start to believe how I'm just a worthless piece off meat. You know, that feeling.

It's true. When I earnestly want to make an effort to do something , life finds a way of saying "Got ya !" to my face.

I want to exercise, a family member brings gargantuan amounts of chocolate.
I want to astonish my teachers into changing their perception of me as a punctual kid and I forget to turn on my alarm for school.
I want to change the world and I barely have the energy to change from my pyjamas to my clothes on a Sunday.

When I wanted to do something worthwhile, why did the world suddenly have a need to dump all of its hate on me. I may be a piece of meat but I'm not that bad .

Life can get pretty suckish when you can't do what you want to. I don't know about you but I get pretty turned off when a goal isn't achieved. It kind of makes me never want to initiate a good habit again.

Let's say you've vowed yourself to sleep before 12 since it's exam week and you need to be fresh in the morning to give a good exam. It is 10:00, the time when you should close your Facebook account and start getting ready for bed when suddenly the love of your life says hi to you in a message.Ouch! Tough call much?

Now this is the time to adopt Nike's slogan as your motto:

So what are you waiting for?
Come hail or snow, just do it. Close the laptop. Say goodbye since you have an exam. I know it's going to be tough. You're probably going to hate yourself for quite some time. But you've made a promise to yourself. Look at it this way, You might get an A+. You'll get into the college of your dreams. You'll be able to make a future for yourself .

Make your day and:

His Sword's Better Than My Sword

Hey Warriors.

Is there ever a time when you look at other people and you go "If only I had her personality I'd be unstoppable" or "If I was as smart as him I'd make it to any Ivy League."

Envy, a lack of confidence and jealousy. These feelings we hide inside are pretty ugly.

Its pretty disheartening when I see beautiful girls starving themselves just to get the body of a Victoria's Secret model. Or when I witness decent people change into someone fake and basically not themselves.

Our lack of self-confidence causes us to doubt ourselves. So whenever we see someone better than us rather than being happy for them we feel inferior ourselves. Some people try to copy people they admire but end up becoming even more confused. For instance your friend may be an amazing public speaker but since you were more of a writer, you couldn't speak as well as him no matter how hard you tried.

The problem with comparing ourselves to others is that we, instead of fixing our faults start to feel sorry for ourself .
.

An apple never compares itself to an orange. And neither should you.

Or we become so wound up in the other person that we start to act like them. Believe me the world has already seen Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey, Nelson Mandela and Michael Jackson. What the world needs now is someone new. It might just be you (hey that rhymes!). You never know.

So what are you waiting for? Get lost and find yourself.

Happily Disconnected

The empty feeling hits me whenever I open Facebook. People look like they are having the time of their lives. Girls who look pretty okay are getting like a 100+ comments on their pictures. When I check out my wall I get about 5 notifications, majority of them being Candy Crush Saga requests.

Facebook portrays a person's social status in my school. Since I'm not the hottest person to be around with I get like a 10 or a 12 out of a possible 100 on the Facebook popular-o-meter.

This is not what Mark Zuckerberg imagined happening.

Now, I'm not trying to besmirch Facebook. I'm just giving an account of the depression I encounter when I use a social-networking site.

And believe me I'm not the only one. Studies show how depression caused by the usage of social-networking sites is becoming common amongst people.

So, now what?

Lets do what my mom did with me. She banned me from using it for a month. At first I was pretty annoyed with her. Later, I felt at a sense of tranquility within me. I no longer worried whether Sara got a 100 comments at her picture compared to my 10. Neither did I fuss about my lack of friends added on it. I was happily disconnected.

Now, I'm not saying stop using your social-networking site forever. C'mon who wants to be a complete nobody on the Internet.

Just limit it. And stop comparing yourself with others .Whether its on the internet or in real life.

Now thats a lot easier said than done but trust me you have no other option since I don't think anyone would purposely choose depression.

Happy social-networking.