Its July. School will reopen in 3rd August. *Deep sigh*
I'm not sighing because school is opening. I'm sighing because school is ending.
It never did occur to me that school would actually end. Indeed my scholastic career has seemed immortal. It just seemed like grade after grade rolled by. But then I came the ugly truth- this life isn't a circle; it is a straight line. And I'm almost the end of it.
Its ugly because I've loved coming to school. Seriously. At times when people pray for a holiday I'm complaining how irresponsible it is to close have an off in a country where strikes are frequent, how we'll just end up just skimming the syllabus and how they'll rush with work the next day. Probably because it the most happening place in my life. I'm not too sociable with my neighbourhood kids or anything. So yeah.
But we are the class of 2016. And this is the last year of school whether I like it or not. But the last year gives everyone a lot of feels. For some its senioritis.Here are my arbitrary feels:
The last year reminds me of dying. on one hand it feels like I'm 90 and the entire world is younger than me.Those older than me have died, leaving me at their place. I'm wise though and the younger ones may ask me questions. I KNOW I'm at the finish line but suddenly instead of running to the end like that:
I'm standing at the end , turning my back against the line and looking at all the other coming towards the end. I wish I could run the race again and feel the strain on my body just once more.
And at the other hand it feels like I'm suffering from a terminal disease and the prognosis states I have one year to live. It comes across as a slap in the face. But I was so healthy? How can I even die. Is what I think. But obviously I can't change much though.
I'm not sighing because school is opening. I'm sighing because school is ending.
It never did occur to me that school would actually end. Indeed my scholastic career has seemed immortal. It just seemed like grade after grade rolled by. But then I came the ugly truth- this life isn't a circle; it is a straight line. And I'm almost the end of it.
Its ugly because I've loved coming to school. Seriously. At times when people pray for a holiday I'm complaining how irresponsible it is to close have an off in a country where strikes are frequent, how we'll just end up just skimming the syllabus and how they'll rush with work the next day. Probably because it the most happening place in my life. I'm not too sociable with my neighbourhood kids or anything. So yeah.
But we are the class of 2016. And this is the last year of school whether I like it or not. But the last year gives everyone a lot of feels. For some its senioritis.Here are my arbitrary feels:
The last year reminds me of dying. on one hand it feels like I'm 90 and the entire world is younger than me.Those older than me have died, leaving me at their place. I'm wise though and the younger ones may ask me questions. I KNOW I'm at the finish line but suddenly instead of running to the end like that:
 |
| And I am VICTORIOUS |
I'm standing at the end , turning my back against the line and looking at all the other coming towards the end. I wish I could run the race again and feel the strain on my body just once more.
And at the other hand it feels like I'm suffering from a terminal disease and the prognosis states I have one year to live. It comes across as a slap in the face. But I was so healthy? How can I even die. Is what I think. But obviously I can't change much though.
And on the third hand (if that were even possible,having three hands), it feels like rukhsati. School raised me, educated me, molded me. And now its time. time to leave, go to another home. A new home. So yes. Cue tears. We'll hug our teachers who became parents, our classmates who became siblings, get in the vehicle give the place a good look once and leave.
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| One good look |
But there are some people who are glad at the thought of leaving school. It's the moment they've been for.
 |
| And now they get to leave like a boss. |
Is this the ideal scenario? But let me ask you a question. What usually happens in the movies? There is a "Once upon a time", there is crisis, there is a denouement and there is an "And they lived happily ever after. The END."
No matter how much lambasting the protagonist faces during the crisis, when the end is happy his perseverance, struggle is worth it.
And no matter how happy, how glorious, how heroic he is throughout the movie if the end is not worth it you can't help feeling sorry for the poor guy. It's true. I'd rather be that parvenu who had a rags to riches success story instead of that rich actress who was once loved and then became a drug addict and died. The end, makes all the difference.
But if the people who are dying to get out are happy and I'm not who's the loser now? Should I make sure I'm miserable in 11th grade or should I glorify my not so happy ending. To be honest, I don't know at the moment.
But then I watched Interstellar and I guess I've found the answer. I know what to do now. Rage.
